When you get off the Metro at the bus depot at King Street station, there are six bays which have 2-3 bus lines that stop at each. The locals surely know where they are going, but what about the tourists getting off the Metro who can not or will not walk the 18 block to the waterfront? They are lost in a confusing set of identical choices. Each bus looks alike; the only differentiator is a numbering system that can only be decoded by being super-human enough to translate the line-art maps of the different bus routes. It’s an intimidating and frustrating experience.

But not anymore, enter the Old Town Trolley.

The trolley simply is the bus for the tourists. It goes straight down King Street to the waterfront, and even explains that right on the side of the vehicle. Now, when tourists get off the Metro there is no confusion of what bus number they want, they just have to look for the big red and black trolley car.

A great way to improve the tourists experience in Old Town.

I had two cards with points from the ESPNZone, one with one single point, the other with 74 points. I asked the clerk to merge the two cards together. He stated that was impossible. I submit that that is technological impasse is rather convenient for ESPN.

Because, I can not move that one point onto the card with 74 points, there are only two options:

1. It is never used, which means a small profit for ESPN Zone, or
2. I add points to the card to bring it back up to the level where I can play off all the points, which is new profit for ESPN Zone.

I recognize that a great deal of the gift card value for businesses comes from the small change that gets left behind, and if I, the customer, neglect to zero out the card, that is my own doing. But at least the legitimate retailer provides the opportunity to zero out the card. Every major retailer from clothing to bookstores to supermarkets will let you run off the remainder of a gift card and subsidize the remainder with cash or charge. ESPN Zone, on the other hand, does not give the customer any options, it just takes our money. When I asked for a clarifying statement, the clerk at the Washington DC ESPN Zone simple said, “This ain’t the Metro, you can’t trade in your cards here. What you got is what you got.”

I got hosed.

I have been tempted recently to shake things up and start driving into work instead of taking the Metro.  On empty roads, it would take save over an hour of commute.  The problem is there are never empty roads.  The Texas Transportation Institute reports that Washington DC has jumped up two spots past San Francisco and into a tie with Atlanta for the 2^nd worst traffic in the nation.  Combine that with a report from last year stating the 270 spur, a necessary part of my drive, as the 8^th worst traffic spot in the nation, and I will be continuing to add money to my Metro SmartCard, at least until the rate hike.

In Macy’s at closing time, I headed for the exit that goes directly into the Metro Center station, only to find a locked door and a guard telling a confused tourist “The Metro’s closed.”  ( I assured the now frantic woman that the Metro was actually still quite open, that this guard had simply locked this door). 

How much would it cost Macy’s to keep that same guard (or one better at communicating with customers) stationed at that same door, but leave it unlocked until the store was emptied? Wouldn’t that simple act provide the convenience of allowing Metro customers to use the exit they are familiar with?  Instead Macy’s forced this tourist, and I and all their other paying customers out onto the streets of downtown DC at night to find our way back to the Metro ourselves.

Dear Metro:

I need you. I do, you get me to work every day, and without you I would have to drive and the Spur is so horrific that I don’t even want to entertain that thought. I am with you, you are my means of transit. But you know that, and I think you’ve started to take our relationship for granted.

You have asked me to pay your rush-hour rates to get to work, and I gladly complied. I am willing to spend the few extra dollars to enjoy the rush hour service, but you have to deliver the service. Metro, ten minute waits for the Yellow Line train is not rush hour service. Spacing Red Lines trains so far apart that there are no seats left at Rockville, your second stop, is not rush hour service.

We generally get along well, I want to continue that relationship. If you can keep showing me the respect of timely trains and we will have many more mornings and evenings together

Sincerely,
Greg

On a very full Metro ride into work this morning, the driver chided us riders in the typical fashion as he drove to the next stop.

Attention customers, when you hear the chimes the doors are closing, please do not block the doors, if you block the doors this train with be unloaded.

Every time I hear this threat, I recognize its futility. We, already on the train, are not blocking the doors, and have no motivation to do so. We, like he, wanted to see those doors close and move on with our trip.

The right audience is the people on the platform waiting to board, they are the ones who would be blocking the doors; however, addressing for them this is the wrong incentive. They selfishly are not concerned if the train de-boards. If they do not push their way onto the full train, then they are forced to wait for the next train. If the push on and cause the driver to unload, they, again, are forced to wait for the next train. But if they are able to squeeze on, and the doors still close, they get to ride this train, and get where they are going sooner.

In over a year of Metro riding, I have heard this threatening tactic again and again. Only once did I hear a driver give an incentive that actually made sense. Once, while at the station, a driver announced to those on the platform.

Attention passengers boarding this train, this train is full. There is another train directly behind this one. The sooner you let these doors close, the sooner that train can arrive to pick you up.

Surely enough, the people did not try to cram on, the doors closed and the train moved on without incident. Right audience, right incentive.